Taking Care of Your Child & Yourself
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Parents often feel frustration and stress
when caring for a child with ADHD.
This makes it even harder to care for the
child. Stress comes from dealing with
the symptoms of ADHD every day.
Stress can affect the whole family.
Learning about different treatments
..helps reduce stress. It is also important
to take care of your own needs. When .
..you take care of yourself, you’re better
able to help your child.
1. Understanding Treatments for ADHD
It’s easier to help your child when you understand the different treatments for ADHD. Many
children with ADHD take medicines. Your child must take medicine just as the doctor prescribes.
If your child stops taking the medicine or doesn’t take it regularly, the symptoms will come back.
Watch for some of the following improvements after your child starts taking medicine.
- Changes in Attention
Better able to finish tasks
Better able to focus on schoolwork
- Changes in Emotion
Less frustrated
Less irritable
Fewer temper tantrums
- Changes in Hyperactivity
Less fidgeting
Able to play quietly
Fewer impulsive behaviors, like interrupting others
Medicine won’t change the way your child deals with other people,
schoolwork problems or low self-esteem. Therapy can
help with these problems. Therapy can help your
child act better and learn to deal with others.
Some kinds of therapy help your child and
family talk about your child’s emotional
problems. Therapy may increase your
child’s self-esteem.
Treatment won’t work without
your child’s effort. Reward your
child for trying to improve. Praise
your child when he or she succeeds
in acting better. This helps motivate your child to improve.
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2. Other Treatment Choices
You may not be sure that your child should take medicine.
You may hear about alternative treatments. Some of these
don’t work. Others are dangerous or unhealthy.
Parents who have children with ADHD may tell you about
their successes with alternative treatments. Companies may tell
you that an alternative treatment is a sure thing. There is no
proof that alternative treatments like biofeedback, restricted
diets, allergy treatments, megavitamins, treatment for yeast
infection, going to a chiropractor, eye training or using special
colored glasses work for ADHD. Dietary supplements can
have side effects.
Talk with your Doctor:
- If your think your child isn’t
getting better after starting
medicine.
- Before treating your child in
another way.
- If you don’t think your child
Should take medicine.
- To get suggestions about
other kinds of treatment.
- If you think your child is
having side-effects from
medication.
- Never stop your child’s
medicine on your own.
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3. Take Care of Yourself
Past newsletters told you about ways to help your child. But ADHD
isn’t just your child’s problem. It affects the whole family. Sometimes
you might feel frustrated and helpless. This causes tension in the
family. Here are things you can do to make it easier to work with
your child.
- Don’t blame yourself
Don’t blame yourself, family members or your home environment
for causing ADHD. Scientists don’t know the cause
of ADHD. Don’t blame yourself when things you do to help
your child don’t work. Be patient with yourself and your child.
- Get involved early
Watch how your child behaves. Noticing
a problem early makes it easier to solve.
You will have less stress if you solve
problems early.
- Educate yourself
Learn about
ADHD. Look at
books and Internet
sites to learn
about new treatments
that may help your
child. This will help you feel
more in control.
- Practice asserting yourself
Be comfortable with being firm and
asserting yourself. It will be easier to talk
with your child. By being firm, you will be
able to help your child take responsibility
for his or her own actions.
- Notice small successes
Feel good about yourself and your child.
Don’t demand perfection from yourself or
your child. Don’t be hard on yourself.
Don’t give up. When you want to solve a
problem, start with small steps. Success
comes in small steps. Enjoy small improvements.
They give you and your child the
strength to meet the next problem.
- Make time for yourself
Take breaks when you feel stressed.
Sit in a quiet place. Do something that
makes you feel good about yourself.
A break helps you cool down and
rethink a problem.
- Focus on the good things
Reward yourself for successes. Never give up
hope. During difficult times, it helps to
remember your successes. Think about the good
experiences with your child.
- Try to relax
Learn relaxation techniques to
help you relax.
Some of these are
breathing exercises,
muscle relaxation
and meditation.
Ask your doctors
or other health
care providers
about ways to
relax. Books and
the Internet also have information.
Eat and exercise regularly. Avoid caffeine,
alcohol or other drugs. This helps you stay
healthy and lessen your worry.
- Build a support network
Find someone to talk to when you have a
problem. This helps you decrease stress. Your
child’s therapist, a social worker, a school
counselor or a pediatrician are all good people to
talk to. Talk to family members about your
frustrations and successes. Don’t be afraid
to ask for help.
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4. Getting More Information About ADHD
The Internet
The Internet
On the Internet, you can join a group for
parents who have children with ADHD.
Books and the Internet may help you to
explain ADHD to your child or to other
family members. Here are some places to
look for information:
Books for Children With ADHD
- Putting on the brakes: A child’s guide to understanding and
gaining control over attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)
by Patricia Quinn, 1991. Published in New
York by Magination Press. (For children aged 4-7)
- Otto learns about his medicine: A story about medication
for children with ADHD by M. Galvin, 1995. Published
in New York by Magination Press.
(For children aged 4-8)
- Sometimes I Drive My Mom Crazy, But I Know She’s
Crazy About Me: A Self-Esteem Book for ADHD Children
by LE Shapiro and MS Hennie, 1993. Published in Long
Island, New York by Childswork/Childsplay.
- The Hyperactive Turtle by DM Moss, 1990. Published in
Rockville, MD by Woodbine House.
(For children aged 5-8)
- Help is on the way: A child’s book about ADD by MA
Nemiroff and J Annunziata, 1998. Published in New
York by Magination Press. (For children aged 5-9)
- Putting on the brakes: Young people’s guide to understanding
attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)
by Patricia Quinn and Judith Stern, 1991. Published in
New York by Magination Press. (For children aged 9-12)
- Adolescents and ADD: Gaining the Advantage by Patricia
Quinn, 1995. Published in New York by Magination
Press. (For children and adolescents aged 11-14)
Books for siblings of children with ADHD
- Living with a brother or sister with special needs: A book
for sibs by D. Meyer, P. Vadasy and R. Fewell, 1985.
Published in Seattle by University of Washington Press.
- I’m somebody too by Jeanne Gehret, 1992. Published in
Fairport, New York by Verbal Images Press.
- My brother’s a world class pain: A siblings guide to
ADHD/hyperactivity by M. Gordon, 1992.
Published in DeWitt, NY by GSI Publications.
(For children aged 6-13)
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